


Stability

by Moit



Category: Lord of the Rings RPF, Real Person Fiction
Genre: Angst, M/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-19
Updated: 2015-04-19
Packaged: 2018-03-24 21:06:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,719
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3784306
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Moit/pseuds/Moit
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Now that I am famous, part of me wants to take it all back.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Stability

**Author's Note:**

> This is radically different from most things I've done (and do). I haven't written Orlando any older than roughly circa 2012 or so. This is a first person (which I also never do) piece circa April 2015 and later.
> 
> Speshul thank you to Naemi for the beta, as always.

All I wanted was to be famous when I was a teenager and clubbing was my favourite thing to do.. I would spend hours smoking and drinking and partying and imagining how good it would be once I could afford to live the life of a movie star.

 

Now that I am famous, part of me wants to take it all back.

 

I don’t drink (much), I don’t smoke (anymore), and the partying that I do is usually because I’m getting paid to make an appearance. I don’t do drugs or sleep with women just because they like my name. I’m a single father who lost the woman of his dreams because he couldn’t slow down.

 

I can’t do anything as simple as go to the coffee shop without someone taking a picture of me and publishing a write-up about my sweatpants and ball cap. (No, there is no designer, love. I bought these at Target because Flynn threw up on mine in the car on the way to the doctor’s office. Still impressed?)

 

Now, I’ve got the opportunity to win back the only man I ever really loved, and I’m terrified that I’m going to muck it up.

 

*

 

There aren’t many people I trust alone with my kid, but Dom and Elijah aren’t just people, they’re practically my brothers. When they asked to take Flynn to the zoo for the day, I couldn’t say no. Flynn loved seeing the animals, and I could use the alone time.

 

When they got back, Flynn was chattering a mile a minute and holding a plushie that looked like the spitting dinosaur from Jurassic Park.

 

“What’s this?” I asked. “A bearded dragon?”

 

“No, daddy, it’s a ass lottle. Uncle Dom got him for me. I named him Peaches. Isn’t he cool?”

 

“An axolotl,” Dom corrected before my eyes could fall out of my head.

 

“Yeah, bud, Peaches is great.” I patted the plushie on the head. “You couldn’t buy him something he could actually pronounce?”

 

“Hey, just be glad we didn’t bring a real one home. Dom thought about it,” Elijah said.

 

“Good thing you didn’t because that thing would have gone right back to LA with you. He’s got a dog. He doesn’t need a . . . an axolotl, whatever that is.”

 

“It’s sort of like a cross between a salamander and a tadpole that lives in fresh water. You keep them in an aquarium. Plus, Sidi is getting old. Flynn’s going to need an age-appropriate pet.”

 

I shook my head. “Not in my house. When something happens to Sidi, we’ll get another dog. I don’t need lizards.” Turning my attention to Flynn, I said, “Why don’t you take Peaches and Uncle Dom to your room? You can show them your new spider poster.”

 

“Okay!” Flynn agreed readily. He grabbed Dom’s hand and dragged him back to his bedroom. I wasn’t sure where Flynn’s fascination with bugs and reptiles had come from, but I was eternally grateful that he had Dom to talk to about them.

 

Alone with Elijah, I suddenly felt nervous for no reason. I’d known this man for nearly 20 years—seriously, where had the time gone?—we’d already spent a lifetime alone together.

 

He wasn’t the same fresh-faced young actor that I’d met all those years ago in Wellington, but I wasn’t the same bloke from Guildhall, either.

 

“Thanks for taking him. I just needed some time alone.”

 

“No problem.” Elijah gave me a toothy smile, a rarity for him, and sat down on the couch next to me.

 

“Flynn adores you.”

 

“Well, when you’ve got the best uncles around . . .”

 

“You’re just lucky Miranda and I don't have any brothers.”

 

“How is she doing? Miranda?”

 

“Well enough. We see each other fairly often, since we’re trading Flynn off, but we don’t generally say more than a few words.”

 

“Are you planning to get divorced?”

 

I could tell the words fell out of Elijah’s mouth before he could stop them. That had always been one of his struggles, not that I particularly minded.

 

“Eventually, I suppose. Right now, it’s more convenient to stay married. Neither of us is seeing anyone, and it’s easier on Flynn. Mum and Dad don’t live in the same house anymore, but we’re both so busy that it doesn’t make much difference to him at this age.”

 

“What if there was someone else?” Elijah asked, and I could tell he was hedging. My heartbeat sped up in my chest, despite my attempts to stay calm. How could he still give me butterflies after all these years?

 

“Are you asking if I’d get a divorce?”

 

“Well, provided there was someone you wanted to . . . be with.”

 

“I imagine I would. I just hope that if I met the right person before Miranda and I decided it was time to end things legally that she—or he—would understand.” I wasn't sure we were speaking in hypotheticals anymore.

 

“I’m sure that anyone who really knows you would understand that he—or—she is the priority in your life, despite what your paperwork says about Miranda. She’s always going to be important in your life, but that’s for Flynn’s sake.”

 

Flynn and Dom walked back out into the living room before I had a chance to say anything else.

 

“Are you ready?” Dom asked, looking between us. The question held more weight than a ride home.

 

“Yeah.” Elijah stood up, and I did, too.

 

Flynn and I walked them to the door where we exchanged hugs. I held onto Elijah a little longer than I had Dom and breathed in the scent of his cologne.

 

“Call me later this week, yeah? I’ll be home until Saturday.”

 

“I will,” Elijah said, and with another one of those rare smiles, he was gone.

 

*

 

Perhaps my most frustrating experience with my fame was last year when we got into a fight at Cipriani in Ibiza. I was having dinner there with Leo, who was on holiday, when Justin Bieber approached our table. I’ve never cared much for him, so I just sort of ignored him as he started saying something to Leo about getting him a table since he didn’t have a reservation. Leo sort of shoed him away, which I found pretty humourous, so Bieber started to mouth off about Miranda.

 

I don’t really remember what he said. I’m normally a pretty composed sort of bloke, but as soon as her name came out of that foul brat’s mouth, I snapped. Leo didn’t help matters much because he was egging me on. I wanted to punch Beiber so badly, but I just knew that if I let myself go that far, it wouldn’t be good for anyone involved.

 

The next thing I knew, someone was pulling us apart, and the other people in the restaurant were clapping and cheering.

 

I don’t want to set a bad example for my son, and I would like to think that Miranda and I have taught him better than to pick fights with strangers at a restaurant in a foreign country.

 

*

 

Elijah called me on Friday, which was just as well because Miranda had just been by to pick up Flynn. Elijah showed up about half six with take away from Bombay, this place on Venice Beach that we both love.

 

Sidi expressed his excitement at seeing Elijah by jumping all over him and nearly knocking the bag of food out of his hand.

 

“Sidi! Get down,” I said, reaching for his collar. He wasn’t normally so ill-behaved, but he always adored Elijah.

 

Elijah laughed. “He’s fine. I missed him, too.” He reached down to pat Sidi’s head.

 

“What did you bring me?” I asked as I reached for the take-away bag.

 

“Coconut chicken curry for me and palak paneer for you.”

 

“You remembered my order,” I said.

 

“Of course.” Elijah flashed me his smile and I felt my stomach flip.

 

We sat down on the couch. Sidi tried to join us, but I pushed him down. “Curry’s too spicy for you, you silly mutt.”

 

Sidi watched us for a moment before finally curling up on his bed.

 

“Forks.” I jumped up and went to the kitchen.

 

“What do you want to watch?” Elijah called back to me. I heard the television turn on.

 

“Doesn’t matter to me,” I said as I walked back into the living room.

 

“ _Psycho_ it is.”

 

“Always horror films with you.”

 

“That’s because I didn’t get to start my career with shitty B horror films.” He leveled a look at me over his curry. “Or epic fantasy films.”

 

“You’re lucky I like this couch or else I’d fling this in your eye.”

 

We chatted through the first half of the film since we’d seen it so many times. It was hard for me to ignore that Elijah kept creeping closer. Eventually, after a trip to the bathroom, he practically sat down in my lap. I wrapped my arm around his shoulders out of instinct.

 

Though I tried not to think much of it, Elijah kept looking at me. At one point, I turned my head and Elijah kissed me right on the mouth. Despite lots of tension in New Zealand, we never hooked up; part of it was my fault and part was Elijah’s.

 

I pulled away and looked into those baby blues that had broken more hearts than I could count. “Are you sure you want to do this?”

 

In reply, Elijah took my hand and led me to the bedroom.

 

*

 

The paparazzi had a field day when they got wind of my relationship with Elijah. I had told Miranda ahead of time, and she’s happy for me. We’ve agreed not to sign divorce papers for now. It’s better for Flynn this way, and he’s the most important person in my life. He’s not old enough to understand who Elijah is to me, but Flynn’s also not old enough to understand that his parents used to have the relationship that I now have with Elijah. I’m sure he’ll have a lot of questions when he gets older, but I’ve known that since he was born.

 

We still can’t go anywhere without being recognized, and now the paps have something new to say about me. We’ve received positive and negative attention, but none of it really bothers me.

 

I’m happy now.

 


End file.
